jPay Message #470

I’m “typewriter” guy now. There are worse hustles, and this one’s actually legit. People need stuff typed up all the time–legal documents, tickets, letters– and are either too lazy or too dumb to do it themselves. The going rate is .50/page, which takes about a half hour. 

The typewriter has memory, so you can type up whole pages first without printing, but it’s nothing like using a word processor on a computer. There’s only a tiny screen that displays two lines of 15 characters, so you gotta keep track of where you’re at on the page and count the characters if you’re trying to write in columns or make a bunch of copies (in the case of gambling tickets). It doesn’t require a genius, but you do need to concentrate. When you’re all done, you set the margins, hit print, and watch one letter at a time hit the page rapid-fire in that loud clickety-clack sound typewriters make (you might be too young to know what that sounds like), but fuuuuccckk it’s satisfying. And, at least, it’s something to do.

I know, I know, this is some gritty prison content, right up there with gang wars on the yard, and talking about how I’m “typewriter guy” is a thinly-veiled humblebrag of what an institutionalized badass I’ve become. Tighten up, b.

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