jPay Message #449

I’m laid up in bed, lazy, mindlessly flipping thru channels, feeling sorry for myself and recalling the million and one things I’d done differently. As if on cue, my cubie says, in his 2 packs a day smokers voice, “Man, you cant think all that coulda shoulda woulda stuff,” thinking about his own shit. His…More

jPay Message #440

You gotta count the little wins. Few things are quite as satisfying as getting a good pump in at night, going back to a cook up bowl, and a hot shower, feeling sore in a good way, knowing that’s another day down, another day closer, having stayed sucka free in a land of lollipops.More

jPay Message #433

The language in prison is unlike anything spoken anywhere else. Movies don’t really convey how unique it is on its own, despite it’s similarity to black vernacular. It’s decipherable to outsiders but many terms don’t make much sense until you experience it up close. One term thrown around a lot is “burnt,” which basically describes…More

Books I Read This Month (June2022)

The Building – Will EisnerNew York – Will EisnerInvisible People- Will EisnerThe Dreamer – Will EisnerBatman: Year One – Frank MillerPandemia – Alex BerensonBreathing for Warriors – Belisa VranichOuter Order, Inner Calm – Gretchen Rubin This month’s reading was a combination of my two literary guilty pleasures: comics and self-help. Will Eisner, if you’re unfamiliar…More

“Stuck In The 90s”

All the electronics are outdated. The technology is all from 20 years ago, like middle school all over again. I walk listening to a Sony portable radio. There’s only access to a very primitive form of the internet, consisting of not-instant email and a knockoff (and expensive) iTunes. My tablet doesn’t have WiFi or internet…More

jPay Message #425

Prison made me realize how, not necessarily a job, but work gives your life purpose. There’s actual full-time jobs, like in the kitchen, washing dishes for 50 hours week for .17/ hour, but most prison jobs are like part-time gigs with some perks, it’s not about the money. Porters use the phone during count, yard…More

jPay Message #420

At first, I just wanted time go by as fast as possible. 2922 days, each one basically the same, let’s just get em over with. I learned how to do that quickly, and in several ways, and could’ve gone on like that for 2-3 years easily, without much self-reflection. In fact, that’s how a ton…More