jPay Message #234

there’s a few things I pay attention to: shoes, tattoos, what’s on their bunk, what TV shows they watch, what books they read. Not in a creepy way, but when you’re jammed into the same living quarters as a hundred and fifty motherfuckers you pick up on a few things. I’d guess a 100 have their own TVs.

further, I can’t help but notice what people, especially my cubies, are reading. most inmates, like people generally, don’t read if they have a tv, or only if they’re on LOP. some read a passage from the same book every day, like the bible or koran. my one cubie reads a 2019 almanac and recites random facts to the cube. “guess what the prison population of Michigan was in 19?” no says anything…then he excitedly rattles off the exact figure.

lately my daily reading has either been James Allen or “becoming a writer”. they’re my bibles for the time being.

so, as I said, I creep on everyones TV schedule, and the new season of most popular prison show is airing: temptation island. (it’s like the spiritual successor to 30 Rock’s “MILF Island”.)

basically, 4 couples are split up and put in a house with 12 people of the other sex, and everyone’s wearing swimsuits for 80% of the show. any show with this many girls in bikinis is an instant classic. 

In the interviews with the couples before coming to the island, theres always one parter whose idea it was to fome to the island “to know fersure if theyre with the right person” or to “prove theyve nothing to hide” from their partner. These types all inevitably cheat, in what is the most passive-aggressive way to break up with your significant other that I can think of.

I don’t think any couple has made it thru unscathed. There has been a guy who met a girl on the island, who was not his girlfriend, and they later got engaged. 

The guys are actually more well-behaved than you would’ve guessed. in the last season, only one dude actually pursued tail with any success (with nearly all the girls there). the other guys were all butthurt their girls cheated on them.

one contestant specifically (I can’t remember what his name was exactly) spent the first few nites strutting around like hes the shit, telling the other girls “I don’t care if my girl hooks up with other guys.” of course, the producers showed that clip sans context to his girlfriend and she ends up cheating on him the next day. he spends the rest of the season bawling over his girl and trying to win her over, in one of the worst public meltdowns ever televised over the course of weeks.

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